Sunday, November 8, 2009

How to Find Your Personal Success

What would it feel like to wake up every day knowing that you are doing exactly what you have always dreamed about?

Wonderful, right? This is what I mean about authentic success: knowing that you are on a mission and living your life in a way that feels right to you.

My experience over the years has taught me that it takes time and courage to find and live your personal definition of success. As a professional coach, lawyer, musician, wife, mother and friend, I have transitioned through a lot of different roles in my life. And my road was by no means a straight-line path but rather was a series of fascinating twists and turns that culminated in what I do today. I transitioned from law to non-profit to consulting to coaching, while maintaining a rich cultural and personal life with lots of great relationships. I started out doing what seemed like a "smart" choice only to learn that it did not work for me. Something told me that there was more out there and I was willing to ask the tough question of what I really wanted-as opposed to what others expected of me. With each career transition, I got closer to my ideal. In each role, I looked at what worked and what could be improved. Today, I can honestly say that I wake up every day feeling totally on mission and excited to confront the challenges and the learning that each day brings.

Here's what I learned:

· Success is highly personal. You are more likely to achieve success when your definition of success is your own, as opposed to someone else's idea of success. Think about what your dream is. That's likely to lead you to discover your personal version of success.

· Sometimes it's hard to know what success is. So look for what works in your life and what makes you feel great. Ask yourself what you love to do, what you do effortlessly, what makes you feel energized and alive and passionate. Again, this is your personal idea of success, no matter how small or how silly it may seem to someone else.

· The more you do things that make you feel successful, the more likely you are to attain overall success. So pick one thing that makes you feel successful--whether it's running a race, preparing and serving a lovely meal, helping a friend, losing yourself in your art, writing something that you love or learning a new yoga pose. Experience the thrill of feeling successful! And take that feeling and see how you can apply it to the other areas of your life.

The question of what success means to you can come up no matter what stage of your life you find yourself: as a student, just launching your career, mid-career or mid-life. Congratulations for having the courage to ask yourself this tough question! Here are some things that might help you as you embark on this journey.

ACTION STEPS:

1. Take some time to reflect on your personal definition of success and then write it down.
2. Write down the things that make you feel successful. What do they have in common?
3. Decide on one thing that you can do this week that makes you feel like a success and do it!

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